“Hey, I have changed!”

change-gifI was reading a few old blogs from myself where in I walked a process with the animals. Here I have written pretty much about how I ignored life in a point at a crucial moment and how I did not accept that anymore from/as myself.

Now, more than a year later when reading back, I see that I really walked through this point and changed myself within. I am not deliberately ignoring points anymore by going into my mind. I am not saying that I am aware all the time, that is still a process that I am walking. But I see that within the point of ignorance of my responsibility in a certain moment I have seen what I did wrong, I faced myself within, I have written it out, walked through the experiences coming up within myself, forgiven myself, written the corrective statements and most important, made the absolute decision to change in this point and from here, I changed.

I notice that when I am at a point of really seeing what I have accepted and allowed within myself, facing myself within the unacceptable and understanding what it contains, what system I am participating in, in/as the mind as distraction from myself and within this understanding / forgiving myself – from here the decision is absolute, it is enough and enough is enough and from here, I change in real time, immediately and it is simply not an option anymore to live out  the destructive pattern again. There are moments coming up where I have to push myself through and do things that I ‘do not prefer or like’ and there may be mistakes that I make and need to forgive and correct myself in and deeper dimensions can/will come up to investigate, but it is not an option to not doing it or to even consider to not doing what is needed to be done within this point.

And from here I become more quiet, more satisfied with myself. In this way I build in and as self-trust and from here I can take on the next point, and the next and the next. And this innitiate point is not an issue anymore, it is not a problem anymore but it is something that I decided to live and that I from here, live and integrate in what I live/how I live/who I am.

And this is very cool to notice. Not because ‘it is so cool and wonderful that I have changed‘ but because it is so cool that I have changed within/as this point, which contains that I am not living this destructive pattern/behaviour anymore where in I hurted myself and another as life.

Here I see the effectiveness of walking this process of writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrections together with walking this application in real time moments and integrating this as a ‘way of living’ as what is best for all in/as life. It are the very painful moments where real shame comes up, where in I face myself and if I dare to look, to see myself, to experience the pain and shame, to forgive and to admit to myself that I did it badly wrong; these moments I have found as the turning-points to immediate, real change that will function as stepping-stones to walk on and to keep on walking and forgiving/changing myself while moving through the challenging times.

Here the words ‘change is possible’ become true as real for/as myself and from here I start ‘believing’ as seeing that change is possible, where it is not an assumed/accepted believe in/as the mind but a living proof in/as myself that I walk and integrate and after several time walking, I notice: ‘hey, I have changed within this point and I am living this change without it being a mountain in my head to look up to’.

So for this, I really recomment Desteni I process and walking this process for yourself together within a group of people as mutual support, as support for and as life to stand up for what is best for all. Which includes everyone and everything.

full_robot-virgins-together-aloneDownload this great song, it’s free. Let’s decide and learn to stand together alone.

Read: The Secret to Self-Realisation.

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Proces van zelfverandering:
http://desteniiprocess.com/courses
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY (Ook in het Nederlands!)

Zelfeducatie free:
https://eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.org
De Kronieken van Jezus

Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
https://nl.gravatar.com/ingridschaefer1
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/326696524041028/

The Secret to Self-Realisation:

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
http://bigpolitiek.blogspot.nl/
http://livingincome.me/wiki/The_Living_Income_Guaranteed_Proposal
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation

Uil forgive

The body-being-mind relationship – Timeline

Dag 583 – The body-being-mind relationship – Introduction

Dag 584 – The body-being-mind relationship – “I don’t care”

Dag 586 – The body-being-mind relationship – Wants and needs, the approach of food

Dag 589 – The body-being-mind relationship – The pain of allowance, within and without

Dag 590 – The body-being-mind relationship – Self-limitation

Dag 592 – The body-being-mind relationship – Sensitivity of the body to thoughts

Dag 594 – The body-being-mind relationship – The need for specifity on a physical level

Dag 596 – The body-being-mind relationship – Hope

Dag 602 – The body-being-mind relationship – Vegan or not?

Dag 607 – The mind-body relationship – When will I succeed?

Dag 610 – The body-being-mind relationship – Articulation and twinkling lips

dag 630 -The body-being-mind relationship – Physical effect of self-forgiveness

Dag 650 – The body-being-mind relationship – It’s a decision

Dag 654 – The body-being-mind relationship – Schussler Salts and Celloid Minerals

Dag 672 – My body-being-mind awareness speaking

Dag 675 – The body-being-mind relationship – Heaviness

Dag 676 – The body-being-mind relationship – Heaviness and emotional suppression

Dag 682 – The body-being-mind relationship – Some fears during the flu

Dag 695 – The body-being-mind relationship – The influence of memories

Dag 700 – The body-being-mind relationship – Embracing the physical as point of support

Dag 705 – The body-being-mind relationship – Who am I?

Set Life Free

Dag 672 – My mind-being-body awareness speaking

Dutch process-blogs in relation to the subject of mind-body, natural medicine and more are to be find here

Disclaimer:

These blogs do in no way contain a medical advise. With unclarity about a condition – physically or mentally – always contact a practioner/specialist/doctor in the related area to get the support you need and from here, see how you can additionally walk your own process to get to know and support yourself in relation to your own body and mind.

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

A moment with Bernard – standing absolute as support and example

PENTAX Image

I was on the farm in oktober 2012. Two years ago now. I was sitting with Bernard at the main house at a table outside. He was supporting me with some things, I do not exactly remember what we started to talk about when sitting there. It was related to relationships and me saying that I would like to have a relationship/agreement. To mention here is that I just left a situation of living together with a male that at that monent did not work out and I was too much in reaction within myself to stay in it. So I was living alone again where in I created a situation for myself to really be with me, to see into myself and have the rest and time to do so. However, there was a great insecurity about ‘relationships’ within me and honestly I felt very ‘old’ while I was 39 at that moment. So Bernard took on this point with me with very simple suggestions that I did not expect. One of this was a suggestion about how to keep my hair, what suited with my face and another was some support about relaxing my face. (I didnot tell him that I was ‘feeling old’ however that was an experience existing within me). He told me that he looked younger at that moment than he did 10 years ago. So he tought me how to relax my jaw/jaw-bones by putting my tongue slightly against my upper palate. And so we were sitting there at the table while I was practising to relax my jaws and focussing on practising to put my tongue slightly agains my upper palate. We were sitting there mostly in silence for half an hour or something. I was very uncomfortable inside myself and all kind pf thoughts were running through my head, about for example him seeing how uncomfortable, how insecure I felt while sitting there. He did not once pay attention to such a thing, he was sitting there in silence with me, looking at the environment, breathing, once or twice remembering me to remember to put my tongue slightly against my upper palate.

This moment was determining for me within accepting this very deep experience of insecurity within me. I feared that he would ‘point it out’ or name it or something and he did not. Saying nothing about it and sitting there with me was all that I needed to walk through this moment. It was for me a ver vulnerable moment, although it may seem like ‘nothing to really bother about’. These words are part of a construct that I have stored within me as to ‘not bother about these apparent small things’ and to not ‘making things so difficult’ or to ‘do so difficult’ about seemingly unimportant details. Which was actually what I was struggling with within myself, as for me it was important but in/as the conscious mind and world, it seemed so unimportant and small and I had not learned to take myself serious in these small details while growing up and so, I learned myself to not take it serious, which was in conflict with me wanting to take myself serious, starting within the detail and seemingly small.

He took me serious and gave me something to focus on and let me be sitting with him within feeling very uncomfortable and insecure within myself. For me he was someone who I completely trusted in seeing ‘with me’. I realise now that this trust within one other being was at that moment in place of self-trust and it functions as a bridge to walk into self-trust. He probably must have seen my uncomfortability and insecurity, however he did not point any finger towards it and so, I could take it on from there within myself and learn to walk with and as myself within taking myself serious in the seemingly small details.

This is an example of how these very very small moments can function as a foundation to walk on from. For me it was important that he was a male and to walk this with a male, because my insecurity was more often towards males, especially males that ‘I looked up to’. To be clear, Bernard never wanted to look up to him but to stay equal with him and I knew that it was/is existing as an experience within me that I only really have walked through if I am standing one and equal towards, with and as myself as him as life. Also about this he never mentioned anything about it towards me. It would not have made sense – I knew it, I was standing equal in certain parts and for the rest it was clear for me that I would continue walking this process within myself no matter what, so it would have been something as ‘pointing out the obvious’ which would not make sense. It was all within that moment of not talking and sitting there with the focus on a practical, physical point which for me was an advise to work on and from here, build my self-trust that I will be able to walk a relationship/agreement some day if I want to if there is an opportunity to do so.

I still apply this suggestion of putting my tongue slightly against my upper palate and/to relax my jaw-bones. I notice that it supports me to breathe, to bring myself in breathing and more relaxing the body, where the focus gets of the thoughts.

This moment at the farm is an example of the responsibility that is laying within taking responsibility for the life of others. This very small moment could have been easily missed or interpretated differently which could have determined the length of process within me within such a vulnerable moment. In the end it is my own responsibility and I was and am very much aware of this, so my approach towards him was not one of ‘wanting him to do it for me’ or laying my responsibility at him. I go there, I open myself up, I receive what he and the others who are living at the farm, are giving to me and I walk on with it within myself. So if he would have act or said different and it would not have alligned within myself, I would have investigated this and taken responsibility for the point within myself as how I was used to do in any case of receiving support. However I have not once be misunderstood by Bernard which for me was of great support as that this is possible and it brought me a step forward. He was looking within me with me, which is so much different as ‘looking at me’ and he gave the suggestions to fill the lacks within me – lacks as the small essential things that I had missed within my life while growing up and that I had not yet been able to find somewhere else. He took my ‘wish’ for a relationship/agreement serious, which was something that I had never done myself as I did not understand several parts of it and was always mixed up about walking together and walking alone with regards to ‘standing alone’ and taking responsibility for and as myself and within this, confused within preferences towards certain types of males.

At the same time, I was aware that within walking a relationship/agreement I would be able to live my utmost potential within an area that was ‘new’ and beneficial for me. So actually my fear within this is related to not being able to walk my utmost potential, which gives another restriction and load towards a relationship/agreement which I firstly had to walk through and let go. The fear is about me, about not being able to let go of my preferences while at the same time, seeing that I am really motivated and able to walk what is needed as what is best. So within this I have been surprising myself many times  – and be surprised by others – by seeing how strong the preferences within and as the mind are and can be and how easily I (and others) can be distracted by this and before one knows, consequenses are created and opportunities are missed if I am not carefully walking with and as myself through this layers.

One being who is unconditionally standing can be determining for everyone of us until we stand in and as self-trust. And each being who stands in and as self-trust, can be this ‘one being’ for another being. Bernards absolute standing  – as an example in/as Life in a human physical body – is still present as a motivation within me me to push through the layers within me in difficult moments as if he is standing so absolute, then who am I to not do so. Until I stand in and as self-trust, in and as life. Within the realization that if I do not stand in and as my utmost potential, another may not stand too and that will be a hard thing to forgive myself for.

So the motivation to do so is not yet one and equal as myself in and as life as I am walking through the layers in/as the mind. We cannot do it alone. Join the group.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to trust myself absolute to walk as what is best for all, where in I see, realize and understand that this walking is a process that needs to be walked in/as the physical to become real and trustable in and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become nervous from my own experiences of fear within me as if ‘something very bad is happening sooner or later’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my own experience of fear and interpretation of it as if something bad is happening sooner or later.

When and as I see myself becoming nervous because of an experience of fear within myself, I stop and breathe.

I realize that I react to my own experience of fear, where in I see the fear related to experiences in/as memories of not being allowed to challenge a mind-pattern from myself and/as another where ‘sooner or later something bad will happen’ if I do so – something bad as someone becoming very angry at me.

I commit myself to stop, breathe and forgive myself for the energetic charges as fear for something bad happening where in I investigate what I am not standing equal to in/as my own mind as fear as judgement.

I commit myself to stop, forgive and correct myself within or the moments that I am speaking in knowledge and not standing as an example but more, asking another to do apply a principle that I am not standing absolute in and as.

I commit myself to practise patience and to become more and more aware of the unnoticed energetic patterns within me so that I can forgive and correct myself within before speaking or acting and so, prevent myself more and more from creating consequenses.

I commit myself to for now, stop creating consequenses by stopping myself from reacting on it when and as I do see them arise.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel the male-ego as ‘wanting to suppress me as a female within my expression’ and from here, find the male-ego rediculous and not something to take seriously.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take the male-ego seriously but to directly want to debunk this pattern and so challenge it immensely in and as the female-ego as ‘I am right’.

When and as I see a slight experience within myself on the background of ‘laughing at the male-ego’ as finding it rediculousness, I stop and breathe.

I realize that whatever it is in/as the male-ego that is playing out, nothing/no-one likes to be laughed at.

I realize that I needed it to be taken seriously in very small points and so does probably another, as we all are trying to express ourselves within the limited conditions that we have learned to do so.

I commit myself to stop laughing at the male-ego as if it is something rediculous and to take someone serious within what one is stating/mentioning in/as a (male) ego-point coming up, within the realization that it might be an ego-point, however within this, the being is present as the being is transferred into the mind by living out the patterns in/as the mind and so, I commit myself to take the being serious within an ego-pattern coming up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to challenge the male ego by bringing forward a principle as what is best for all, first because I challenge the male ego simply because I am a female and secondly because I speak in and as a starting-point of inequality towards a male in general, in and as fear which leads to not taking the male-ego seriously.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take serious that what I fear and so, that what I judge in/as the mind and so, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take myself serious in/as rhe mind and from here, being surprised by the patterns coming up.

When and as I see myself participating in fear of challenging the male-ego and/or en ego in general, I stop and breathe.

I realize that my starting-point is not equal in/as myself as a being in/as life and so, I need to check myself first on (surpressed or slightly present) energetic reactions before speaking.

I commit myself to first check myself on energetic reactions when and as I want to bring forward a principle as what is best for all and to name and forgive myself the experiences as a release of the connected energy and from here, see if I can bring forward a principle as what is best for all and how to bring this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look up to a male and within this, create a polarity within and as myself as fear as judgement to feel ‘better then’ as a compensation for this ‘looking up to’.

When and as I see myself going into an experience of fear, related to ‘looking up to a male’, I stop and breathe.

I commit myself to stop looking up to a male or anyone else and to breathe and see what it is in that moment that ‘I look up to’ and why, where in I can see how to stand equal to this and how to bring it back to myself in and as a skill.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to point out the obvious certain times in and as an energetic reaction within myself which gives another and/as myself the opportunity to not take serious what I bring forward as a principle as what is best for all.

When and as I see myself pointing out the obvious certain times because I am in and as an energetic reaction, I stop and breathe.

I realize that I diminish the principle that I bring forward and within this, diminish myself by speaking in and as energy.

I commit myself to stop pointing out the obvious in and as an energetic reaction, to stop myself from speaking over and over the same point and to walk out if possible, to first clear myself from the energy coming up and from here, to see what is possible as/and to bring forward a principle as what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take serious the mind-patterns that are so obvious that I do not understand that they come up so many times and that it is not be seen, instead of realizing, seeing and understanding that it are more automated reactions in which we put a veil on the pattern itself through which our self-responsibility becomes invisible.

When and as I see myself reacting to the thought that I do not understand that a mind-pattern comes up so many times, I stop and breathe.

I realize that I react to my own thought and so, I am in judgement instead of forgiveness as understanding.

I realize that in certain situations, in/as the mind I see understanding as a ‘diminishing’ of myself as if I ‘stand under it’ and so, I keep myself away from understanding as forgiveness as I do not like the related experience of diminishing.

I realize that this must be some related experience for another too, seemingly even more for the male-ego which might make it harder to go into understanding as forgiveness and self-forgiveness as self-understanding.

I commit myself to stop myself from participating in a thought that I do not understand something and to directly see what it is that I stand not equal to and forgive myself for this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take myself serious in/as life in the small and detailed moments and points as how life shows itself and from here, allow myself to be ridiculoused by myself and/as another in/as the mind.

When and as I see myself tending to reject myself in/as a principle as what is best for all in/as life, I stop and breathe.

I realize that I am not yet standing equal to and as this principle and so, my approach is (partly) in/as the mind in knowledge and information and so, I am not ready to share this as a living example.

I commit myself to stop rejecting myself in a point of what is best for all in/as life that I reject myself in and to investigate, forgive and correct myself until I do no longer reject myself in and as this principle.

I commit myself to walk in self-honesty with and as myself in seeing what I am standing equal to and what not and to share what I have walked for and as myself.

A process to be walked and to be continued.

Uil forgive

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

 

De Bestemming van Leven – Tijdlijn van de Principes

The Desteni of Living – De Bestemming van Leven

1. Het realiseren en leven van mijn uiterste potentieel.

10. Het Zichtbaar maken van Liefde (deel 1)

Dag 604 – Waarom desteni I Process?

10. Making Love Visible – Het Zichtbaar maken van Liefde (deel 2)

(Wordt in de loop der tijd aangevuld).

aarde

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een: Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd: https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation Equal Life Foundation: https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation Proces van zelfverandering: www.desteniiprocess.com www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY Proces van relatie naar agreement: www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships Zelfeducatie free: www.eqafe.com/free www.desteni.net www.desteni.org Journey to Life: 7 jaar dagelijks schrijven 7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/ video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?: http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/ Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf: http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

My Declaration of Principle – Mijn verklaring van Principes

The Desteni of Living – De Bestemming van Leven

walking aloneThe following Principles give me focus and direction to stand alone without fear in equal respect for and engagement with All Life.

De volgende doelstellingen geven me focus en richting om alleen te staan zonder angst in gelijk respect voor en verbintenis met Al het Leven.

I endeavour to live the following Principles and I commit myself to give this all my effort:

Ik streef ernaar om te leven volgens deze Principes en ik stel mezelf ten doel me hiervoor volledig in te zetten:

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1. Realising and living my utmost potential

1. Het realiseren en leven van mijn uiterste potentieel.

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2. Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

2. Leven volgens het principe van wat het beste is voor alles en iedereen – dat mij leidt in gedachten, woorden en daden om altijd op iedere manier problemen te adresseren tot een uitkomst die het beste is voor alles en iedereen.

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3. Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

3. Leven volgens het principe van zelfoprechtheid – om ervoor in te staan dat ik zuiver ben in gedachten, woorden en daden: zodat mijn binnen- en buitenwereld één en gelijk zijn. Wie ik ben vanbinnen is wie ik ben vanbuiten en omgekeerd.

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4. Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

4. Zelfpurificatie door Schrijven, Zelfvergeving en Zelftoepassing – de daad van het realiseren dat ik verantwoordelijk ben voor mijn eigen gedachten, woorden en daden, om mijzelf mijn misdaden te vergeven en mijzelf te veranderen zodat ik ervoor insta dat ik verantwoordelijkheid neem voor wie, wat en hoe ik ben en hierdoor te weten dat ik mezelf kan vertrouwen om altijd eerlijk te zijn met mezelf en dus met anderen.

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5. Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

5. Leven volgens het principe van Zelfverantwoordelijkheid – waarin ik mij realiseer dat alleen ik verantwoordelijk ben voor wat ik accepteer en toesta binnenin mij, mijn relaties en mijn buitenwereld en dus met deze verantwoordelijkheid: heb alleen ik het gezag en de mogelijkheid om datgene te veranderen waarvan ik zie dat het compromitteert wie ik ben, wat ik leef en hoe dit anderen beïnvloedt.

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6. Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

6. Realiseren dat wie ik ben in gedachten, woorden en daden niet alleen invloed heeft op mijzelf – maar evengoed op anderen en dus met Zelfverantwoordelijkheid in gedachten, gevoelens en emoties – neem ik verantwoordelijkheid voor mijzelf en dus mijn relaties om Zelfgewaar te zijn in ieder moment en op zo’n manier te leven dat het ’t beste is voor mij en dus ook voor anderen.

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7. Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

7. Leven volgens het Het Principe van Zelfgewaarzijn  – het gewaar zijn, zien, herkennen van mijn eigen gedachten en geest, het zelfoprecht zijn welke zich uitstrekt tot waar ik verantwoordelijkheid kan nemen voor als ik zie dat mijn gedachten / Geest niet zijn / is wat het beste is voor mij / anderen en het tot doel stellen om onmiddellijk verantwoordelijkheid te nemen en te veranderen voor mijzelf en dus voor anderen.

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8. With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

8. Met het nemen van verantwoordelijkheid voor mijzelf, het gewaar worden van mijzelf – het nemen van verantwoordelijkheid en het gewaar worden van anderen in mijn leven, om hen te assisteren en ondersteunen zoals ik mijzelf assisteer en ondersteun – om te geven zoals ik zou willen ontvangen en om elke dag het extra beetje te doen om te zien waar ik kan bijdragen aan het leven van anderen en dus aan mijn eigen leven.

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9. Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

9. Leven volgens het principe van zelfvertrouwen – als ik mijzelf ten doel stel om constant te blijven in mijn leven van zelfoprechtheid, zelfverantwoordelijkheid en zelfgewaarzijn, sta ik als een onwankelbaar vertrouwen zodat ik altijd op iedere manier weet wie ik ben, wat ik ook onder ogen zie en dat ik hierin weet, als bewezen in de standvastigheid van mijn leven dat ik altijd zal eren en staan bij wat het beste is voor alles en iedereen en dus het beste voor mij.

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10. Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what is means to LIVE

10. Het Zichtbaar maken van Liefde – door zelf niets minder te accepteren / toe te staan dan mijn uiterste potentiëel, om hen lief te hebben zoals ik mijzelf liefde heb laten zien door mijzelf mijn uiterste potentiëeel te geven, het beste leven / de beste levende ervaring en om anderen te laten zien zoals ik mijzelf heb laten zien wat het betekent om te LEVEN.

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11. No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

11. Niemand kan jou redden, redt jezelf – de realisatie dat het gereedschap en de principes van Desteni de leidraad zijn, maar dat ik zelf het pad moet bewandelen. We zijn hier om elkaar te assisteren en ondersteunen in dit proces van Bewustzijn naar Gewaarzijn / LEVEN en wat het betekent om te leven – maar het proces zelf, waar je alleen bent met jezelf in jouw eigen Geest: wordt alleen gewandeld.

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12. Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

12. Niet wachten voor iets of iemand om verantwoordelijkheid te nemen voor mij en deze wereld – maar dat ik mij realiseer dat ik gecreëerd heb wie en hoe ik ben in dit moment, daarom heb ik de verantwoordelijkheid om te veranderen wie en hoe ik ben en dus de realisatie dat wij als een collectief deze wereld gecreëerd hebben als hoe en wat het is vandaag de dag en dus is het de verantwoordelijkheid van het collectief om te veranderen hoe en wat de wereld vandaag de dag is.

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13. Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

13. Het leven eren in elk persoon, dier – alles van het grote tot het kleine van de aarde, opdat we ons gewaarzijn en onze verantwoordelijkheid uitbreiden om het best mogelijke leven te creëren voor iedereen en alles en dus onszelf.

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14. Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

14. Relaties als Overeenstemming: individuen die samenkomen en een overeenstemming gebruiken als een platform om één-op-één uit te breiden, groeien en ontwikkelen als individuen in het leven en het levensonderhoud om elkaar onvoorwaardelijk te ondersteunen / assisteren om hun uiterste potentiëel te bereiken waar de overeenstemming een samenkomen is van individuen die begrijpen wat het betekent om te staan als gelijken en te staan als één.

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15. Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

15. Seks als Zelfexpressie – waar seks een verenigde expressie is tussen individuen in eer, respect, overweging en achting van elkaar als gelijken, twee fysieke lichamen verenigd in gelijkheid en eenheid – een samenkomen van twee gelijken als fysiek één.

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16. Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

16. Realiseren dat bij de hoedanigheid van mijn aanwezigheid in deze wereld – mijn verantwoordelijkheid zich niet alleen uitstrekt tot mijn eigen Geest / mijn eigen leven, maar tot de ‘geesten’ en levens van alles en iedereen van deze aarde en dus is het mijn doelstelling om dit gewaarzijn uit te breiden tot de gehele mensheid om samen te werken en samen te leven om deze wereld tot een hemel op aarde te maken voor onszelf en de generaties die komen.

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17. I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

17. Ik moet in mijn gedachten, woorden en daden – maar meest belangrijk in mijn daadwerkelijke leven, een levend voorbeeld worden voor anderen in mijn wereld die waarneembaar en zichtbaar is als het gaat om het potentiëel van een persoon om zichzelf te veranderen en zo de wereld te veranderen. Zodat meer mensen zich kunnen realiseren hoe we deze wereld kunnen veranderen, door verenigd te staan in onze zelfverandering binnen het principe als wat het beste is voor alles en iedereen om een hemel op aarde te brengen.

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18. I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

18. Ik ben de verandering die ik wil zien in mijzelf en in mijn wereld – een hemel op aarde brengen is het in het leven roepen, in het leven brengen van het LEVENDE VOORBEELD van een PRAKTISCHE HEMEL die gezien en gehoord kan worden in onze daden en woorden. We zijn de Levende Hemel die in creatie moet komen in deze levende wereld.

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19. Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

19. Door het purificeren van mijn gedachten, woorden en daden – wordt mijn innerlijke wereld mijn uiterlijke wereld, dus ik breng mijzelf als hemel op aarde in creatie, waarin ik me realiseer dat het niet voldoende is om ‘de verandering te zien / de verandering te zijn’ – om verandering WERKELIJKHEID te laten worden moet het een constant, consequent leven zijn van mij door de woorden die ik spreek en door de daden die ik leef die zichtbaar en waarneembaar zijn voor iedereen in ieder moment van ademhalen.

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20. Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

20. Realiseren dat mijn fysieke lichaam mijn tempel is – mijn fysieke lichaam is het levende vlees door welke en in welke ik een hemel op aarde in het leven roep en op aarde zal creëren / manifesteren als mezelf in mijn woorden en daden en dus eer, respecteer en acht – verzorg en ondersteun ik mijn fysieke lichaam zoals ik mijzelf als gelijke zou verzorgen en ondersteunen: mijn lichaam ben ik.

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21. We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

21. We zijn de verandering in onszelf en in deze wereld waarop we gewacht hebben: en dus stel ik mezelf ten doel om mezelf en mijn leven toe te wijden aan ieder-één als allen om dit te realiseren, omdat er niets zal veranderen als we niet veranderen in alles wat we zijn, vanbinnen en vanbuiten.

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22. The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

22. De realisatie dat voor mezelf, om in staat te zijn om mezelf te veranderen in gedachten, woorden en daden tot het meest effectieve levende wezen dat ik kan zijn en worden – zal ik eerst mezelf moeten kennen (‘to know thyself’) en dus stel ik mezelf ten doel om te onderzoeken, binnenin mij te zien en begrijpen hoe ik ben geworden wie ik ben vandaag de dag, om de weg voor mij voor te bereiden tot in de zelfcreactie van een verantwoordelijk, gewaar, zelfoprecht en betrouwbaar persoon voor mijzelf en dus voor anderen.

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23. The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

23. De realisatie dat voor mij om in staat te zijn bij te dragen aan verandering in deze wereld – moet ik mezelf leren kennen (‘to know thyself’) als deze wereld and dus stel ik mezelf ten doel om de innerlijke en uiterlijke mechanismen van deze wereld te documenteren, onderzoeken en binnenin mij te zien en de systemen van vandaag aan te passen om het best mogelijke leven voor alles en iedereen op Aarde te presenteren.

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foto 3-kopie

De bestemming van Leven – Tijdlijn van de Principes

In blogs to come through time I will expand on how I see, realise and understand each Principle and applied it and / or will apply practically in my daily life.

In blogs die komen gaan door de tijd heen zal ik uitbreiden op hoe ik elk Principe zie, realiseer en begrijp en hoe ik het praktisch toepas en / of wil toepassen in mijn dagelijks leven.

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

From Christianity to Desteni – How did I do that?

media_xl_1033183-bijbelWithin the Google Hangout about Christianity there was a question how I was able to step out of the Christianity boat and start walking within the principles Desteni stands for. On this I answered that I never really stepped into the Christianity boat but that I had made a shift from the ‘love of God’ towards the ‘love of soulmates’ or just an ultimate partnership with ‘The One’ as something ‘to reach out for’ within myself. Which is so, I did made that shift, so that was/is the greatest illusion for me to walk through. However, I found my answer incomplete. As the reason why it was easy for me to let go of what I found supportive within Christianity and to start walking with Desteni, is that within Desteni, the words of Jesus are involved and actually taken as a starting point. ‘Investigate all things and keep what is good – Do onto another as you would like to be done onto – Give as you would like to receive’.

‘Investigate All Things and Keep What is Good’, ‘Do onto Another as You would Like to be Done onto’, ‘Give as You would Like to Receive’ – See more at: http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/03/day-333-jesus-message-is-not-religious.html#sthash.lbn04T7U.dpuf

Within Christianity, the words of Jesus in general within the bible – not especially these ones mentioned above – were what was intriging me and within this, there was Forgiveness involved. The role of God as presented within this religion was something that caused some friction within me everytime these words were spoken and so, I never stepped “into Christianity” as I could not stand as and by everything that is presented within.

So, when Desteni came in – Sylvie found Desteni on the internet and started investigating everything and involved me within this and one of the first things that she mentioned was that the words of Jesus are in it – and because of ‘the words of Jesus’ integrated, it has not been a point of doubt with regards to what I have walked within Christianity, as finally the words of Jesus are used and implemented, investigated and lived in common sense. (Before this Sylvie and I were investigating how to be ‘disciples of Jesus’ in a more common sense way and Desteni is actually providing the tools to walk and implement the principle of equality and oneness in a practical way).

Because I have not been raised ‘as a Christian’ in  a direct way – indirectly we are all raised within a religion – and I had shifted my veil of illusion towards the ‘soul-love’ (which I will expand on sometime later), I have never allowed myself to accept Christianity as ‘the one’ religion – although it was the religion that I could find myself in the most if not applied in an absolute way – and I also did not create a resistance towards Christianity. As I said, the illusion that I did have allowed myself to accept, was the illusion of the soul as ‘who we are’ and within this I had kind of accepted the concept of soulmates, however there were also always some doubts about it, some unclarities, but I wanted it so badly and it was the only way for me to see any sense in relationships, so I accepted it more or less. I also interpreted the words of Jesus within a ‘feeling’ inside as ‘divine love’, so there did take place a separation as an interpretation from it in and as the mind to make me ‘feel good’. But I approached it in and as a self-investigation where in I myself was the reference. The problem here was that I was not a clear reference for and as myself, because, as everyone, I have separated myself in and as the mind which I did not really understood for what it is – for who I am and have become and so I kept on searching for answers.

The concept of forgiveness as how it is offered in a Christian approach, that I struggled with, as I did not understand how I could forgive another. I simply felt inside that I had not forgiven and so, I could not say and live these words.  However I understood that forgiveness is necessary as we cannot hold on to revenge. So then there is a problem as I did not have a practical way to apply and live this.

Within Desteni, the tool to work with is Self-Forgiveness. Well that is something that I immediately could accept and start working with, although it took me a while before I could really grasp the totality of it. And from self-forgiveness I can go to forgiveness, as understanding of self means understanding of others as self. (The difference between forgiveness and self-forgiveness has been discussed within the Google Hangout).

So, from Christianity – the words of Jesus as written in the bible and the concept of Forgiveness – towards Desteni – the words of Jesus expanded and explored in common sense and applied in practical living and brought back to self in and as Self-Forgiveness – well that is how it was clear for me to go from Christianity to Desteni without having conflict in this decision.

Within Desteni, the existence of Humanity and the role of God is explored and explained in detail for the first time in human existence without leaving information behind. So, if one is really interested and ready to face how we have existed as humanity – you will find everything in Desteni that was unclear within Christianity. As every so called Christian or other religion participant  has questions that are answered with ‘only God knows’. Some put them aside, some keep on asking, some turn their back on the religion, some accept a complete illusion – it are all ways to ‘deal’ with the lack of real information. This is what I always ‘bumped onto’, which I experienced within myself as ‘it is not complete, it is not making sense, it is not ‘whole’ in a way’. I have never experienced this within Desteni, as everything make sense. And – what I did have as a clear reference, was my own body and physical complaints which was the main reason for me to keep on searching and also here, I finally got answers and tools to really investigate and start to understand the influence of my own mind within this all.

Of course I have experienced and do experience resistance to let go of my own created illusions, to not want to face myself, to protect myself as who I have become. But I never have had this friction inside myself that their were no answers, that there was information kept away and things like that or that it doesn’t make sense.  There is total clarity, frankness and support; if one wants to look inside self. If one is not willing to investigate and see into self, everything will be interpreted as a polarity to keep the illusion of the mind alive and so, information will be turned around within ones own mind to protect itself. Until one find: ‘Oh my God, how could I have missed this’. As we have missed ourselves completely within existence.

What I have done in the beginning is to start with the information that makes sense and to not only focus on the things that cause resistance inside. I did take time for it, to walk through resistance, to see for myself if ‘there is really no other way’. I accepted the things that were provided to me and I did read it, although it was with resistance and fear of ‘loosing another illusion’. Untill I decided, okay, if this all make sense, then I should investigate everything. As I cannot keep on walking with one foot in and one foot out and only take what ‘suits’ me. It’s all or nothing in a way. And from here, things did change as this decision will support oneself to open up, to really see, listen and investigate and bring the resistance back to self. And interesting enough, a part of the resistance will disappear within this decision itself. For the rest one will during walking realize that there is no other choice than ‘bringing it back to self’, as no one else will make the change for us.

Is this than a brainwashing, just as how a Christian accepts God in a way? As how I have accepted ‘the Soul’ in a way as a shift from god to the soul as ‘god’? I can say, No, it’s not. It is a decision to STOP the brainwashing and illusion and to start taking self-responsibility for it, as it, within it. But this is what one can only walk and proove for and as oneself. As our own walking, will be our own proove. Change willl not take place over one night.

So from ‘Christianity to Desteni’ – I would say, it is a practical way of walking as how Christianity is ment to be within the words of Jesus and we do not follow Jesus, but we follow his words within a practical application, in and as ourselves, as what is best for all Life.

How does that sound?

To investigate:

What is the relationship between Jesus and ‘Life’?  (Interview)

Day 333 – The Jesus Message is Not a Religious Message

Dag 461: Sceptics Failed the Jesus Message

Jesus – I’m not comming on a cloud

Jesus – The forgiveness of Jesus

Jesus – The Guidelines of Forgiveness Part 1

Jesus – Responsibility

Mother Teresa’s story: The life of the saint Part 1

Mother Teresa: My perspective on purity

Winged – The Chronicles of Jesus

Dutch:

Jezus (Overzicht artikelen)

De Kronieken van Jezus

Jesus EQUALITY for ALL DESTENI(Reis van ziel naar leven)

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

 

 

To give it my all – How the animals teach me what real support is

In december Witneus the female rabbit became suddenly very ill, pneumonia, I wrote about it during that days. Here I write in an overview how this intensive support of her supported myself to get the best out of me.

For a few days just before she became clearly ill, she walked into the house more often and wanted to sit in the house for a longer time. I allowed her to do this, however sometimes I pushed her a little to go back outside again – the rabbits lived outside during that days and I was not sure how staying inside the house for hours should influence the thickness of their pelt. So, here I missed a sign of her and did not investigate why she wanted to stay inside the house for longer. Rabbits are prey-animals and they do not show when they are ill and when they show, the illness is often already present for a longer time. However they do give some signs when we really are aware and this was a sign from her that I did not take seriously.

The day that I noticed there was really something wrong was when she was sitting with her nose in the air. I have had a rabbit in the past who was sitting with her nose in the air for many days but for the rest being normally active, eating normally, so I did not have a clue that there was something going on with her. Until she was suddenly one day that ill that it was too late to do anything; pneumonia as I heard at the vet. However, I learned this that time and saw it immediately now when the nose was in the air. I also had to go to work that day and did not know what to do in the short time before work. I called my collegue and discussed; he would try to find someone to replace me (I often work alone in a healthstore) and I said I would be a little late. She sat down in her hutch outside, in the nightcabine which is more closed and warmer. I moved on to work. On the way to work I started seeing what was bothering me, which was the point that I was not clear on where to housevest her and the malerabbit (they lived together outside the house and I have a pretty small room inside the house where also another quinea-pig was living). I saw that I would take her in the house and could leave Casper – the male rabbit – outside. It seems strange that I could not see this clearly immediately however this is how the mind works and what I am already walking for years while taking care of the animals, that somewhere in the practical care-taking when they become ill I loose sight, get stuck and do not see a practical solution. Actually it is a little bit of an apathic reaction which is not cool, as with these small animals, you have to be fast and take action immediately otherwise it can be too late.

So, I had my solution, in the afternoon a collegue could replace me and I could go home. At home I immediately took her into the house and knew I had to go to the vet. It was friday night and the last consulting-hour before the weekend so I had to catch this one. I called my parents to drive but one was out with the car so it was not possible to bring me. I have another option to go by bus and walk 2x 10 minutes which is less comfortable (for the animal and me as well) but anyhow pretty well doable. Here again I saw myself linger, thinking about asking the neighbour or taking the bus and saw, okay, I have to push myself and I have to do it fast otherwise I am too late for the bus and the consultinghour. So I did, I pushed myself through this lingering, took her in a basket and went to the bus. At the vet, they confirmed that it was pneumonia, gave her anti-biotica and explained me that pneumonia with rabbits is a risk for their health as they produce very thick mucus in the lungs that is not easily going away and so, the chances to survive are not so large, however there are rabbits who make it. They also told me that she was quite sick already. I had seen this too, however I also knew her al the years before and she had never been sick and been in good physical condition and very enthousiastic to live and also, the symptoms were not that long present so, there was a chance she could make it.

I went home, left her in the small basket, put a warm-water bottle with her in the basket and some green-food for if she was able to eat something. And so we passed through the night. The days after this, she had a lot of difficulties with breathing, sat with her nose in the air all day and a little bit standing up, with her forelegs against the warm water bottle that I put down their so that her breast would be a little bit warm. She could barely eat but she had to. So I gave her fluidfood with vessels especially for sick rabbits. Besides this I went outside and took everything that I could find that she might like and easliy eat, like dandelion, plantain, clover, yarrow, chickweed and some grass. It was winter but very soft weather so I was lucky as there was still some green findable. She did not eat by herself but when I hold it before her consistently she would take some eveytime and actually even made some funny jokes with this, as taking it out my hand and put it away on the ground for example when she did not want it anymore, and when I hold on tight, she could not take it away but instead the leave teared apart and she had again some food in her mouth which she chew on. Until she showed me that she really had enough.

She lost weight of course and we found a rithm of fluid food 2x a day and 1x a day anti-biotic and 1x a herbal conbination with colloidal silverwater and a drop of vitamin D to reduce the mucus and to support her lungs and immunesystem. I did this all together for 4-5 weeks very intensively, I slept down in the same room with her (I have a sleeping-couch there) and only went out longer for work. And within this period, I learned the most important point: to give it my all. I knew and noticed that I had to give it my all to pull her through this and that I had to do every little thing that I saw as important for her, very small things as getting the food she would like most, giving it to her often, checking at her, being consistent in the medicines, actually being totally here for her.

I have seen Bernard doing this at the farm and heared from others how he applied this, giving his all in very small things, seemingly points that looked as ‘not so important’ or even out of proportion. This is what I within my mind, allowed to take over in the past while taking care for the small animals, as actually I had the tendency to give it my all but had some thoughts and beliefs about this as ‘not suitable’ or ‘too much’ because it is ‘only a rabbit’. It was not how I consciously saw it myself but however, allowed myself this behaviour just because this is the common approach of taking care of animals. So actually I did not really stand up for them as myself. I also had a belief during that days, that dying is something maybe even better than living, which is actually a point of religious brainwashing and so I had a tendency to let them go more easily instead of investigating everything completely before doing so. So it was more about ‘who I am within’ than actually neglecting the caretaking that was not alligned within myself with what is best for all. This combined with the lingering and apathic behaviour of myself when I needed to take action immediately and coming up with practical solutions and also very important or even the most important point of influence, not having a car and not having so much money and the vet costs always a lot of money, again combined with living alone and grown up within an experience of having to decide a lot of things by myself; well all this points together I faced while taking care of the animals. And everytime a small animal became sick I could pick up the point I learned from an animal in the past and a new point came up that I had to learn and integrate. So, with Witneus, she was the first who I have given my all – and people who knew me before would say, but you always did this isn’t it? You are always so very carefull with the small animals. Just to give you an idea of what ‘giving my all’ entails; the ‘being carefull’ as I was before, is not enough. It is not the same as giving my all and letterly pull the animal through with everything I have where instead of this, somehow and somewhere, I let them go and so actually I let them down. In very small points which are easily to be excused. But every excuse is one excuse too much. So, there were no excused in this period with Witneus and I just took on everything I saw that needed to be done and as long as was necessary until it’s done, walking it day by day without knowing how long this would take and without knowing if she would make it. As this was not the most important thing, it was important how we walked through and who I am within.

Well, she did make it. After the period with anti-biotic, she had still difficulties with breathing and so with eating, as eating and sitting with her nose in the air to breathe at the same time, is very difficult. So, discussing this with the vet again. They said that the anti-biotics is done, the bacteria is gone so she needs something for the alveolus, for the lungs, to get more air. Something similar as they give to people who have asthma and then for animals. So she got that, and almost the same day it became better. Within a few days she ate by herself, and she eated all day because she was actually very hungry and had to get some weight. I gave her this medicin 2x a day and also the herbs and some colloidal silverwater and vitamin D for 3 weeks and she became stronger and recovered within this period. after this I went back to 1 time a day, and again after some weeks 1 time a day I started to half the dose of the herbal combination and staying with 1 time a day the medicine for the alveolus. With this I will move on some weeks and then probably stop the herbs and go on regurly with the medicin for the alveolus as this is recommended by the vet, based on experience with other animals that when stopping for a longer period they often start getting difficulties with breathing again.

The point of not really be aware of the signs before they become ill, this came back with the male rabbit who died last week. I wrote about this also. The short period of decisionmaking and support in passing away went well as I learned to discuss these kind of things with the vet and if necessary with someone who is able to see with me. However the point of this small signs before becoming ill I had not actively responded to, I noticed it again but did not respond, I did not pick it up and so, after Casper had passed away, I saw this point still being here and interfearing with my decisionmaking and taking action within the moment of illness. So this point I have to correct in writing and then walk again in real time when the moment is here. Actually I saw that I did not consider myself in this, in what I actually wanted as being some more closer with the animal for a while – meaning inside the house, some hugging, but again, of not knowing how to do this practicle I did not take this seriously and so I actually am not taking seriously myself within this point, which is harming myself as another living being. And because of staying in this ‘not knowing how’, I do not start investigating it and so I do not even give myself a chance to find a solution that is practical and best for all including me. So this is what I am moving on with. As this point is making it more difficult, when and as an animal (or human) dies, as I have seen that after this passing away of another living being who we lived close with, the points come up where we did not give it our all and so we feel sadness, which is actually a feeling of regret of missing out on moments of opportunity to share, to be intimate from a starting-point of self-intimicy. The animals did not miss these moments, it are we as human who miss them because we miss ourselves and we need to walk a process to become one and equal with and as ourselves. And if we do not do so, we will face this within and as ourselves when and as we die ourselves.

Actually what I describe here in very small points, is what is going on in the world on a very large scale. From the small to the big, it is the same point and only in the small, within the situation that we are living in and being able to direct, the changes will start taking place, if we are willing to see and to take ourselves seriously within this. Life is showing itself in very very small points, it is vulnerable and strong at the same time and this is what we easily and on a daily base, walk over and ignore. So we ignore the being vulnarable and we miss the being strong within this. And as long as we ignore, we do not have to pick it up, we do not have to face ourselves as being vulnarable and so we do not have to change ourselves and, we will never become one and equal as strength as life as our full potential. So we see, there is something wrong, but we are not really aware of it and we do not dare to really see into this as we do not yet know the solution and so, decide to ignore. Which leads to a survivalmode where in we act and pretend being ‘strong’ but which is actually weakening ourselves and life as a whole, which is quite visible in the world today.

Ignorance is a decision although it seems as we do it ‘automatically’ but actually, every time we ignore something it is a decision, in every moment. So to stop the ignorance, this is a decision too. First it is to stop the ignorance and within this, we give ourselves a chance to look, to see, to ‘not know how to do this’, to forgive ourselves for what we see and what we do not know yet, for what we have allowed to exist within and as ourselves, to investigate and discuss a solution, to correct ourselves and make a new script as an ability to change and to eventually, actually change in physical reality as the final proof to and as ourselves that we have walked a process to selfchange, from ignorance, apathie and an experience of powerlessness towards consideration, self-movement and practical solutions.

We will not get proof on forehand that it ‘will work’ as the only proof possible, is walking it for and as self. We will become the living proof or we will not see any proof at all. So waiting for a proof before starting, it’s not gonna work.

Starting within the small, starting to take self as life seriously as within this, one will start taking life seriously in/as everyone.

So does this mean that ‘I am ready’ now? That I have learned to ‘give it my all’ in every moment? No. I have learned this within this one point. Where in it became very clear to me how and where I am actually not doing this which is in many other points. This is a process to walk as the resistance to do this has been integrated in many ways within myself and my physical body so it requires walking a process day by day, consistently and continiously, to deprogram myself within this and become the living proof of myself in and as my full potential.

Will you walk with me, with us?

Desteni-I-Process-Lite (Dutch translation available) and Desteni-I-Process-Pro.

Thanks (below two pictures from Casper and Witneus in the snow some years ago)

PENTAX Image

Video’s:

Witneus

Casper and Witneus januari 2014

Related blogs:

Day-374-how-every-breath-counts/

Dag-380-woordweb-roos-projectie-terug-naar-zelf-halen

Dag-417-de-verzorging-van-witneus-het-konijn-als-levend-voorbeeld

Dag-443-casper-het-konijn

All blogs related to animals:

http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/category/dieren/

PENTAX Image

(Picture: find the white rabbit! Click to enlarge)

Investigate

Psychic Animals – The Sheep – Part 1

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

Speaking myself through the top of a headache and see further

female symbol

Some days ago I started to see how within the whole condition of my intestines there are related emotions towards an experience of inferiority of myself as a female towards males. It was still vague and very deep located in the body, and I was somehow aware of this experience always, but also because it was always ‘there’ so to speak, at the same time, I was not really aware of it that one of the dimensions of the tense in my intestine is related to this experience.

I spoke quite a lot of self-forgivenesses through the day and the point started to move, and I also felt it related to the liverfunction, as some kind of emotional suppression within myself which gives my liver a difficult time to do it’s job properly ( in energetic test-results it shows often that the liver need some support in the function of detoxification). However I felt I did not really move through. At night I had a chat with my buddy, and we discussed the point. She gave me some blogs of her where she had written out a similar point some time ago.

The next day my period started and I woke up with a slight headache on the background; I have this more often right before and/or at the beginning of the period; even so had my mother, it was actually the only thing that she complained about from what I remember as a child, and when here periods stopped because of the menopause, she has very seldom headaches anymore. This specific headache is started within the muscles on top of my shoulder (muscules trapezius), goes to the occiput-bones, and is also connected to some points within my large intestine where cramps are located. From what I understood from a tradionional chinese medicin practiser and also feel within my own body, is that the points are all located on the liver-meridian.

If I moved slowly and focussed on relaxing my shoulders and stopping the thinking every time, the headache was ‘bearable’, and I did my daily tasks in a slow way. I had a chat with Larry and I discussed some of this point with him, and still felt in this how I was not really able to move and express within this point, and actually felt myself sitting back – partly now because of the headache – within this experience of inferiority as a female towards a male (which is not an experience that I have particulair towards him, it is more general existing on the background within myself, which gives a sense of ‘control’ in the communication with a male).

So afterwards, I decided to read the blogs that my buddy send me. I read them out loud and in between I added self-forgiveness on the points I saw coming up within me, related to this point. Halfway the speaking of the blogs, the area in and around my intestines became warm, emotions came up, and I could speak myself through the top of the headache while speaking the self-forgiveness. I saw why it was not something that I could write myself easily, as it where points coming up that I had not really lived myself but more points that I was actually ‘holding myself back from’, as it are points that I had seen my mother participating in quite extremely, not so much in angryness as well in a direct giving up on herself on forehand, before even speaking to the male, in and as a starting point of ‘not being listened to’, and vice versa, my father was not an ‘angry’ person at all, but could have a particular stubborn way of expressing and/or actually not expressing. So most of these signs took more place in a ‘not expressing’ rather than in expressing through angryness and other emotional voiced words.

And for myself, I tried to keep myself away as much as possible from this ‘behaviour’ coming forward out of an experience of inferiority and ‘not being listened to’,  where in I do become angry when this experience is triggered, and so in reality this meant that I tried to keep myself away from a relationship with a male that really had a chance to succeed.

I will keep on investigating this point as this is only opening up, and share some more about it if and when a point comes up that I need to write out more specificly. So far this is a moment of witnessing for myself of how to speak myself through (the top of) a physical point with the speaking and reading out load of self-forgiveness which gives relieve of the physical pain/discomfort and support to let go the stored emotional energetic experience that gives the pain and discomfort. It is also a witnesssing of how blogs from others can assist and support in walking through points inside ourselves within sounding the self-forgiveness out loud for and within ourselves, even though the words might be slightly ‘personally different’ placed; the construct is basicly the same as a construct of the experience of female-inferiority against male-superiority which is widely lived, played out, constructed and build up within and as the mind-consciousness-system within and so in and as this world-system without.

Related blogs that I read out load:

Who I am in Relation to MEN as Patriarchs: DAY 130

Why Women Use Emotional Manipulation: DAY 131

Why Women become Submissive in Discussions with Males: DAY 132

Some self-forgiveness on the most prominent points coming up within and as my own memories related to this point:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel so powerless when and as I see my mother going into in what I perceive as a submissive attitude before she even started to speak about something with my father, and within this, starting to reject my mother in and as this behaviour, as I did not want to have something to do with what I saw and felt so powerless in, and so trying in and as rejecting, to keep myself away from this submission towards the male, in and as a belief that if I keep myself seperated from it, it could not really effect me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel really compassion for my mother in and this behaviour as what I saw as so hopeless unable to express herself and stand up, which is a feeling that I did not allow myself to really feel and stand up in, because I myself did not know how to express myself and stand up, and so, I rejected her and within this, seperated myself from this experience of hopelessness and desperation in and as belief in the incapability of expressing self and standing up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience and so perceive myself as incapable of really directing myself in and as self-expression, while at the same time, I know and am aware of my capability to stand up in this, which gives and has given a friction and conflict within myself for so long, seperated in a vision of myself which is not compatible with how I am living myself within reality every day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel hopelessly sad and suppressed when I see my father as what I perceive as ‘stuck within himself, not being able to express himself’, while I see as what I interpreted as the friction, stuckness and disempowerment on his face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel stuck inside myself when and as I am not able to express myself looking at my father, which gives an experience of friction, stuckness and disempowerment within myself from which I believe I am not allowed to stand up in, because when I do stand up in this, I leave my father alone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my mother for the experience that I perceived within my father but actually was experiencing within myself, of feeling stuck, frictioned and disempowered.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to freeze inside whenever I hear the subtile manipulations and little nasty tonations and words between my parents which are build up inside and so find a way out, because of this incapability of open and frank self-expression with each other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel deeply and endless sad because of an experience of being caught within this pattern between my parents, feeling unable to change anything within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wanted so badly that my parents had a ‘happy and open’ marriage and if this was not possible, that they then better could have a divorce so that this pattern could be broken through and that I did no longer need to sit in between.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see a divorce as the only option as solution for the problem to open up the situation in and as communication, and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have lived myself the ‘solution of leaving a relationship’ as the only way that I saw to solve the problem as opening up the situation, experienceing myself as unable to stay and open up myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that ‘I am better of alone’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel myself caught in between my parents where in it even looks like that I enlarge the pattern.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I enlarge the pattern between my parents, and within this, make myself, in and as this believe, responsible for their incapability to communicate effectively together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make and feel myself responsible for what I see as their incapability to communicate effectively with each other, but when I asked my mother sometimes about it, she denied everything and said she had no problems at all with it, while at the same, in the rare moments that my father expressed himself openly in his dissatisfaction and disappointment about things in his life, first thing that my mother said was ‘don’t be so negative’, and so, the communication was suppressed immediately.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress the communication with my mother by acting like ‘I am fine’ and by not really listening and or waving away her expression when she did express her dissatisfaction about little things in her life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to touch my fathers protectionmechanism as for me it feels like so much accumulation that it is almost imbearable and so, I should tiptoe around it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what I perceive as the imbearable load of what my father is suppressing inside himself as emotions and feelings and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself the imbearable load of what I am suppressing inside myself as emotions and feelings, instead of seeing, realising, and understanding how only the suppressing and accumulation makes it unbearable as being ‘too much’, while walking it through one by one, it becomes something that I am able to do and actually that everyone is/will be able to do if the tools of how to do this are provided.

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Next day my shoulders and neck feel like ‘having more space’ to move around, the headache is still gone, and also the few hours of menstruationpain in the belly that I often have at start, did not come up this month. The tension and delay in the large intestine is still here although there is a layer on top opening up a bit, which is a point I will keep on investigating for and within myself, layer after layer.

After finishing this blog, a very intense cramping pain is coming up inside my intestine, so I lay down on the floor, push soft but constant on the pain-point, hold my legs against my body crawling up to come deeper within my body and start investigating and applying self-forgiveness untill the cramp relieves, push through when the pain is unbearable, push and stay, push and stay, not giving up this time, because as Bernard says, when you cannot have it anymore, you have to push through, and so I do, it must be here, if there is a pain, there is something suppressed; until I see something of myself as who I am and within this, the cramping gives in, starts moving and releasing:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, in a moment of revenge (from which I do not have a direct memory, I can only see the direction within the experience which is from a very young age) choose between my father and mother, and within this, play them out against each other in and as my mind,  where in I try to hold on to my father and push anway my mother, but my father is gone, he is not here and because I have already choosen, I cannot go back, and so I have to protect myself in and as this ‘choice between’, caught within polarity in and as the mind, welcome to the evil.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I have made ‘the wrong choice’, where in I perceive, think and believe that I cannot go back, I don’t know how to go back, and so I keep on following this pattern my whole life, playing it out within relationships where in I every time again ‘choose’ for the male who is unavailable, ‘not here’ and leave the male who is staying next to me no matter what, where in I end up alone and within this creating an experience of eternal sadness – which I know now, is generating energy within myself – and for a long time blaming my mother for the whole set up within myself, because she is the only one that is still here and involved in it within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel regret to not really see how my mother was always standing with me – with her ‘faults’ of course but she was here – because I turned away from her, looking for the one that was missing, believing that he must be somewhere, I felt ‘this love’ inside, I know ‘he loves me’, so where is he?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not understand where he is and why he is not coming.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my mother for not finding him, for pushing him/my father away, and so she has to ‘pay for it’, and so I push her away, even so as I blamed her for doing this – an eye for an eye – within and as my perceive and believe that she ‘did this to me’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not understand and believe that I did this to me, to my father and my mother in and as my mind; that I trapped myself within this fall, the fall of the mind in and as an eternal revenge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my breath away in and as a moment of scare within myself for myself as who I am in and as revenge, in and as the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn to my father in an undefined moment with my mother that I felt threathened by her, but he is not here, I cannot find him and so I have nowhere to go but to go into my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ‘left alone’ by my father and from this, create an experience of fear to be left alone. (NB my father was physically present in my live but not really ‘here’ – as none of us – and able to open up).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive and believe that leaving brings a solution as safety, instead of seeing, realising and understanding, that within leaving, going into and as the mind, I make myself vulnerable for every manipulation in, as and of the mind and ‘loose my safety’ as being here, equal and one with and as the physical at the moment that I choose to leave where at the same time, from now on I need to ‘protect’ myself as who I am in and as this decision of leaving as what is not best for all, so I need to ‘keep on leaving’ to keep the pattern alive as protectionmechanism from seeing myself in the face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stay in and as the experience of fear of lost, because I choose to leave and lost myself within this in and as the physical within this one moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forgive my father on forehand for everything and to blame my mother on forehand for everything and within this, giving my self-directivess away, creating separation and conflict within and without myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep looking for love outside myself that I perceived I lost once while searching for my father ‘to protect me’, instead of seeing, realising and understanding that it was an experience inside myself, reflecting with and as my father, and so looking outside myself is only seperating myself in and as projection on another human being, even if it happens as a very young child with my father, the principle is the same.

I commit myself to forgive myself the layers upon layers that I created within myself after taking my breath away, and correct myself evenso in and as stopping the revenge in the moment when it comes up, perhaps suppressed in and as a physical pain, investigating and forgiving it specific, until and where in I, slowly but surely, stand up, equal to who I am as the mind, to enable myself to become equal to and one with and as life in and as the physical as what is best for all as life.

I commit myself to stop leaving, to stay here and sort out myself.

To be continued within myself as the pain is moving and opening up a little.

Thank you.

Veno – Self Forgiveness – Male Ego

Veno – Self Forgiveness – Female Ego

enjoying the day

Desteni-I-Process-Lite

Desteni-I-Process-Pro

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Leefbaar Inkomen Gegarandeerd:
www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

Bernard Poolman

[602241_10151555849528638_781079000_n%255B8%255D.jpg]

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Sunday 11 august 2013 Bernard Poolman has passed away. His heart stopped beating.

See blogpost on Creation’s Journey to Life.

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I am not sure where to begin so I describe what I walk through since the message sunday afternoon that Bernard passed away.

When I read the message on email I first understood that his heart stopped beating and I expected that the message would go on like ‘he is in the hospital and being reanimated’ or something like that.

This is not so. Bernard really passed away.

Sadness is the first thing that comes up in me, together with disbelief and incomprehension and a thought as ‘what should we do now?!’

Soon after this it become very clear to me what to do: to move on with the activities that I am doing, and with the group who will continue doing the tasks. It was as if I was making some kind of checklist inside myself to see if I am able to continue the work what I started within Desteni, without the physical presence of Bernard being here anymore.

I am able to continue. I have called Larry and Sylvie and asked them to open the email. I wanted to share this with them. In the hourse after this, I was still pretty clear.

We have had chat at 20.00 with the whole group. Within this it became clear that Bernard will not be coming through the Portal:

Bernard will not be coming through the Portal. You must understand that Bernard was an individual standing within and as all of existence in his Physical Body; now that he is no more in his physical body, he as what he stood as, as life, as here, as all, as one, as equal still remains within existence; but he is no more an individual being/person………….. So, we cannot talk with him personally as a him personally did only exist for the time-being on earth as to what was necessary to be done. Therefore, we as individuals still here have to stand and walk this Physical Process. The dimensional process is/has been done and walked  we have to take it from here into/as the Physical and we have everything we need.

And here the real sadness came up. He is really not here anymore as ‘Bernard’, also not as an individual being in the dimensions.

The group is directly standing up within the responsibility to continue with the activities in and as Desteni untill it’s done. There are questions but there will be coming an interview from Sunette and this will probably answer most of the questions.

In the hours that follow, everything becomes clear very fast with regards to the points that I have not yet taken real responsibility for within myself; the things that I saw, but not yet ‘picked up’ to really change within myself. All these points actually leads towards the same conclusion, that I still trusted on Bernard in a way, that I am not really aware of what ‘life’  is, that I do not understand how he can deside to not continue as an individual being but as existance everywhere, being present in all life. Most of all are related to missing a point of absolute certainty. This is what I have missed so much during my life, and what I have experienced, seen and received as a support and example from Bernard. This is the point what I did not bring into standing in a sufficient way within myself because of participation within and as the mind, which gives an experience of self-doubt.

I notice that I made attachments towards Bernard with regards to his total effort with absolute certainty to bring in Life as what is best for all, untill it’s done, and that I used his absolute certainty and dedication as a motivation to push myself through. After being in South-Africa, I have asked myself several times if I would move on in self-honesty no matter what, and the answer was ‘yes’ every time. It is what I wanted to do for already 20 years, but what I was not able to take on in totality, because I was missing the complete information, the tools to bring it into practise and a living example of how to do this. I was missing the act of self-forgiveness, and without self-forgiveness, no real change is possible. Bernard and Desteni gave me the information, the practical tools and the living example, and within Desteni I picked up tasks that I am able to complete, with or without Bernard, and so I can move on with what I am doing already.

At the same time I noticed that there was still hesitation to really live in absolute certainty and dedication towards and as life. It was as if there was some kind of, “yes, but” within myself, and I was moving, but it seems like moving too slow; it felt like pushing through a fuzzy cloud of distraction.

So, the absolute certainty and effort from Bernard I used as a motivation to push myself through. And this is what I need to be for myself. During this week after his passing away, I notice a change in myself and around me, as if some veil, some ‘noise’ has moved with him. This is related to the removing of the physical systems that he was working on, and the last one that he took on while and with leaving his physical body. (There will be coming interviews about this from Sunette – you can read her blog here). As if for the first time, I see myself as being able to do this, to take full responsibility for my own mind and to work together with the group on bringing a solution into the world. I experience it as if the support as the living principles as Life as Bernard was standing in and as, is spread out everywhere in and as existence, as a platform to walk on, available for everyone who is ready to face oneself in self-honesty.

There is no choise anymore: I have to walk into living as what I see, realize and understand as the only solution and we as a group as Desteni have to walk and bring the solution into the world, and we as a group as humanity have to bring this change into living, as the only solution to live in equality and oneness in and as this physical world. We have to be, become and continue in being practical living beings as what is best for all, and within this we have to stand the test of time, as Bernard stood the test of time and has become timeless and always Here, in and as support as Life, in and as the Living Principles.

His carefullness in every breath, is what stands most by me, as Anna is also describing in her blog about Bernard.

This starts in tender care in and as myself,in the very small things. Really listening to myself. Applying self-forgiveness on the fear that comes up in this; fear for standing up in and as life in carefullness in a world that is not carefull. There is so much to do in this before I am really able to be carefull in every breath.

(Compassion in Action)  (Blog Cathy)

Life is caring, the mind is not. So the systems that exist have to be realligned with and as the living principles as what is best for all in and as carefullness, and so we need to stop the starting point of self-interest in and as the mind. This starts within ourselves, as only when we as as humanity change into carefull and trustworthy beings, we will be able to change the world into a place that is Best for All Life.

This is what Bernard and Sunette are pointing out every time again: “You only need to take full responsibility for your own Mind Consiousness System and to forgive and change yourself within this”.

This is how change will take place as 1+1+1+1+1

“Give as you would like to receive”.

Within this, real care will come in. As first there is the giving and then there is the receiving.

Bernard said several times to me: “You are still scared of people”. “What to do” I asked. “It’s a thought”, he answered.

Within my witness-blog about going to the farm I described (part of) my experience with  Bernard on the farm.

I can keep on writing while the words are not fully describing what Bernard has given and how gratefull I am for what he has done. It is to each one of us to really live as his example in and as the Living Principle.

Here are a few lines from the chat that shows how it is not about Bernard but about the Living Principle that he brought into the world, and only living by this living principles and within this, bringing life into the world until it is done, until all is life, is a real expression of gratefullness and respect towards Bernard, who is standing as Life-Self-Realised. Because, what we all are really missing is

LIFE

in and as ourselves, and so in and as the world:

we have to become the living example of the living principle in the physical (Sunette)

he’s always stood in existence, as existence – here, so he’s “here”, but not “Bernard as an individual” – what I mean with ‘he’s here in/as existence’ is the Principle, Life (Sunette)

he told us -it is never about the individual, but the principles, thus we cannot use any excuses that bernard is not alive, because the principles still stand and it is up to us to stand (Cameron)

Consider the point that Bernard wasn’t something special  but the embodiment of a principle that we can all develop ourselves as; so  then I would suggest to simply stand as that point yourself of giving yourself your life back through being disciplined, and diligent in your process of standing up (Viktor)

he will be missed – but we will not miss his message/his words/what he stood for/as – this we’ve got to take and live and continue to do so (Sunette)

I would say Bernard did a better job than Jesus. Establishing the process of walking as equals as one as the principle – so we individually and together see this through, he was the guiding point, and now we have enough guidance to guide ourselves and each other and so to those still to come to be walking with us (Sunette)

we cannot rely on one single individual as that would be again ‘following a message’ instead of living it (Marlen)

Need to look at what you saw in bernard and found missing within yourself and then give it to yourself (Fidelis)

All he ever asked of us is show others the support he has given us (Fidelis)

we each stand as a specific point within this process – Bernard stood as the living example of what we are to become, life self-realised – walking the process we have established / each has ‘their point to stand’ – so, ‘life individualized’ is like self realisation process of being/becoming life and we have the process / structure to walk to be/become it (Sunette)

 Bernard Poolman –  Living The Word Alive: DAY 231

Thank you

Video support Marlen

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(This is partly a translation of the Dutch blog that I wrote on 13 august 2013)

(Dutch blog with related self-forgiveness)

(Dutch Journey to Life blog)

(English Journey to Life blog)

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
www.equalmoney.org
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
http://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

Going to the Farm in South-Africa

In octobre 2012 I have been to the farm in South-Africa for a month. I went there together with Sylvie Jacobs, another Dutch participant from Desteni.

On the farm in South-Africa, there live about 15 people who are investigating and working on a solution for the total inequality that exists on earth, which starts by and goes hand in hand with the process of changing of self within this. Because, we are the world, and if we are not able to change ourselves, then how will we be able to make a change in and as the world as it exist now.

The people on the farm live together with a lot of animals. Horses, dogs, cats, ducks, chicken, geese, and of course all the small and large ‘wild’ animals and insects that live on the land they share. The people live in different formations, as single person and some married couples. They live in 3 houses which are standing near to each other with a piece of land around the house. In every house there are living animals: in all 3 houses there live dogs, in two of the three houses there also live cats and in the one house without cats, there live parrots. Animals and human are living together, they share the space and enjoy the company of each other.

Everyone live and work together from the principle of finding solutions to clean the mess that we have allowed and created on earth, and change ourselves and the worldsystem to make this eventual happen. (The process of how this is done, is readable in the large amount of blogs that every participant is writing on a daily or regular basis.).

What I noticed here, is that the living together is very stable. What do I mean by that? The people who live together are not projecting their own reactions as emotions and feelings, towards each other. So, everyone is bringing their own mind-movements, as thoughts, emotions, feelings, internal conversations, back to self, and not speaking them out towards another. When we bring everything back to self, we give ourselves the ability to sort out what is going on in our mind (within the process of writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application) and we don’t need to speak this out towards another outside ourselves. This makes the living together stable, because there are no – or little, as everyone is in a process of self-correction – projections towards each other. No blaming outside self, no critisism towards each other, and if there is, it is something to consider and bringing back to self for investigation, as an inequality in self is triggered. If there is an unstablity noted, there is direct support to sort this out, inside self and in cooperation with each other, to walk through this point that comes up, to find a new stable platform inside self.

The people on the farm work constant and continuesly, varied by physical work as working on the land and taking care of the house and animals, and work of support and process, which is mostly done on the computer. The tempo of the working is constant, physical: the work needs to be done, but there is no need to rush and run and hurry and stress about it. The work is combined with pleasure and making fun, and in between there is some time to relax, to watch a movie, to listen some music, to play with the animals. It is not as ‘taking a day off’, it is more relaxing in between and during the work that needs to be done; being comfortable in doing the daily tasks.

Sunette, a young woman who lives at the farm, leaves her body almost every day to give access to a dimensial being who gives an interview. With a dimensial being I mean a being that does not live in a physical body at the moment. This dimensial being can enter the body of Sunette when she leaves her body, and so speak through her body to give an interview. This is called ‘The Portal’. The portal is giving all the infomation that was always hidden in ‘heaven’, because no human before in the entire history, was able to remember what happened after death and bringing this back to earth while living on earth; neither was a human before in history able to completely leave the body while living on earth, unconditionally, without interference of the mind, and within this, able to give complete physical information from and as the being that enters the body. (Remember, channeling is a total different story, where the information that one had/has access to, was/is always contained by the mind, and so manipulated and influenced by the preprogramming of the mind consciousness system. Channeling was used to control the human beings in and as the mind. The information that was given through channeling was deliberately incomplete, and incomplete is never best for all; it leaves ‘parts out’, so it is selective which is not equal and one).

So, I have listened daily to interviews from the portal, which is Sunette, leaving her body and giving acces to dimensional beings, who share their story of realization after death, as a support for living on earth as what is best for all. In the dimensions they stand for what is best for all; they give and stand as full support, so it is up to us, humans on earth, to change ourselves in our physical bodies and the system here on earth, into a living that is best for all, here in physical reality, here on earth. The information given in the interviews is very detailed and very specific. It is given in series where each interview follows up the interview before, but they are also able to be listened on itself as each intervied contains a specific subject. I found it very supportive to listen to them daily, to see and being a physical witness of the coherence between heaven and earth, visible in the portal. The information gave me a lot of realizations, as the subjects are tuned on the people that are physical present at the interviews. In general it trained me to listen with ease to English interviews, as we were often listening to 3 interviews after each other in about 2  hours, with only a short break in between, from which I still benefit while listening an interview from eqafe at home on my mp3.

I have watched her, I have asked questions, I have heard voice changes from different beings inside her body, I have seen a small change in the look in the eyes, and always the body of Sunette was stable, here, present, in front of me and some others, able to do every physical movement that we are able to. The leaving of her body and giving access to a dimensional being, and coming back in her body, was done in a breath, One Single Breath.

The interviews that take place almost daily, are always done with more than one being around, and all the interviews are available in the eqafe-store, as a support for every one who wants to support self and life on earth to find solutions and make it livable here. It is information that has never been shared – probably some small parts of it, but never the whole story of existence, in heaven and on earth – and if you  are able to stop your scepticism and really listen from an open perspective, you will find out yourself, slowly but surely, how it really works and have worked for an uncountable amount of time. Remember, scepticism is part of the brainwashing, where you exist in fear and control, and this is keeping you away from real investigation, inside yourself and in the world.

So, nothing is hidden, everything is available, everybody is standing by their own name, and everybody is writing and within this, everybody is a witness of what a human being is capable of. As an individual but always in cooperation with the group, as nobody can do it alone. And this is also a very important realization: I cannot do it alone, I cannot stay on my island in my own mind, hiding from the rest, as nobody alone can make a real change in existance.

I have seen Sunette as someone who is gentle and always ready to give support, to give an answer to every question that is asked. She lives together with every one else, like every one else, doing the same work, playing with the dogs, eating food, having some rest in the night, working on the internet for hours, etc. She is a human being who dedicated her life to make life on earth a dignified life for every living being.

Bernard asked me once I was sitting there, okay, what is the difference between you and her (Sunette), and I was giving answers as ‘she is here’ and ‘she is in breath’ and things like that, but actually I had not a clear answer as no words for what I noticed as this difference, accept that I saw that I was distracted by everything inside myself and around me and she was not, she was sitting behind her computer, working, stable. Bernard said after every answer I gave, “be more concrete, name it; you don’t know what ‘being here’ and ‘being in breath’ ” means. Well, in the end he gave the answer and that is, that she had made the decision, the decision that she is able to change herself, that she will change herself, and she is living this decision daily.

After being at the farm I understood, it is all about making the decision. If I do not make the decision, I will be distracted and directed by the mind, by thoughts, by emotions, by feelings, by every opinion inside myself and around me. This is what separates me, what makes me doubt myself. And in every point that I have to walk through I notice that only if I make the decision to do so, I have walked through, and I will walk through. As long as I am not making the decision, I am distracted by the mind and let myself distract by the mind, and I allow it, and I accept it. Which means, I have to investigate what is going on in the mind, what I hold on to, as I still believe the story that I made up in the mind, the emotions and feelings connected towards and within this. Until I am clear, until I have forgiven myself and my own self-interest related to the point and the story, I will be distracted by my own experiences in an das the mind. And when I am clear, I am able to make the decision, and I can walk through and stop the distractions in and as the mind.

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Back to daily living at the farm.

When we arrive there, we start participating in their daily life-routine. The routine I followed:

5.00 waking up; 5.30 kitchen-garden; 6.30 some house cleaning, coffee, (others go to the horses); 8.00 garden-work; 10.30 breakfast; 11.30 interviews; 13.30 lunch; free-time/computer-time; 15.40 horses; 16.30 free-time/computer-time/cookingtime; 20.00 chat; 21.00 computer-time, 23.00 bed-time. Weekends are free from gardenwork.

The first week in South-Africa I was exhausted from the agitated year in The Netherlands before. I was feeling overwhelmed because of all the emotions I had build up during life, and not being able to relax within this anymore. My physical body was restrained. I understood the information that is presented by Desteni, but I did not see how to practically live this, how to be comfortable in this, how to be comfortable in my own body in general.

The land, the plants, the animals, the sounds, the life inside, is giving support to slowly relax the body, to come down to earth. The people are giving space to just walk through this stress, to settle down in the new environment. They share their process experiences, they explain how they work and what we have to do to work together in this new environment, how to take care of the animals, how to work in the garden, how they share the house, how they take care of the house and devide the tasks as cooking and cleaning. They give the possibility to participate in every practical job; we are supposed to join where ever we can within the space of a comfortable ritm, without force on the physical body.

I  have had conversations about process, with the people we live with in the house, with Sunette for support, with Esteni for process-support related to DIP-pro, with Bernard Poolman for process-support in general. How did Bernard support me in my process?

From what I have seen, he speaks to each person in different voice-tonalities in which we are able to hear him. We have all a different programming, related to the genetics and environment that we grew up in. In this we are sensitive to different voice-tonalities, meaning, if some one for example, speaks in a very load voice to us, which scares us very much because it triggers a memory in relation to a load voice and fear, we are not able to hear the words that one speak and we only ‘hear’ the tonality and our own reaction to this. So the voice-tonality plays an important role in the fact if we hear what is being said, as long as we are moved by this pre-programminging and reactions related to memories.

To me, he spoke in an easy, gentle way, as in this I can listen to the words without going into judgements towards myself. I have heard him speaking to another destonian in a more ‘discussion-tonation’, and she was responding to this equally, in which I saw this as a way of speaking that she is comfortable in, and so able to hear the words that he is speaking.

Within this, in general, he showed me the points that are hidden in me, to face myself who I am, to support in general to become a trust-worthy being who is able to stand on his own two feet, which starts with self-trust. This will make me able to access situations with common sense, able to investigate myself and the world where we live in. This self-trust I was really missing (and still working on) and so I doubted everything inside myself, even though I knew it is real what I see. Most points were points that I already had seen, that I already know,  but I did not yet changed it, and so I am not standing in my upmost potential. Some point that he brought up was really hidden, as I would say unconscious. I knew there was something not in place with it, but I was not really aware of it, although I noticed that it influenced me. So the moment he brought it up, I recognized it and was touched by it, and it needs investigation inside myself.

Did I have stand up in self-trust and become trust-worthy in a month? No! It is a process for years, a Journey to Life. But one month at the farm has given me a platform to walk this process, to push myself through the difficult points, to stand up if I fall. It confirmed me in what I had seen inside myself as being real, but where I could not stand in, as nobody around me could stand with me in this in common sense, in absolute certainty. It is this absolute certainty that Bernard stand in that really supported me. Have you ever been considered by a human being who is standing in and as the principle of what is best for all, meaning, who is confronting you with the points inside yourself that needs to be changed, that are not best for all, and at the same time giving you the most gentle and respectfull support that is possible, that is giving you the missing links through which you were not able to stand up? Just by giving you some words, or by sitting with you for a while, showing/teaching some small, simple, physical changes? In which you notice, with this, I can move on, I have missed this my whole life, I have missed my whole life a living example, just one, and one time given this support is enough to move on with, to stand up in, to walk process on. With this, I am able to walk on. This is what Bernard gave to me. For the rest, it is up to me, to my own decisions, to my own integrity, to my own ability to push, to forgive and to correct myself and bring it in reality; with the support of the group, the dip-course and the information and instructions available on internet.

I would like to give another example of how the dogs supported me.

I am not grown up with dogs, and not used to their behaviour, so it often experienced some anxiety around them because I didnot know how to behave myself, how they would respond, and they have pretty sharp tees and can be pretty big, so I was not sure how to approach dogs.

At the farm, there are Many dogs! In the house I stayed, there were living 5 dogs, from which 3 large ones. I liked them immediately, and after a week I became more comfortable with them. It are the dogs that I ‘missed’ most after leaving the farm, as they are very supportive to just be here, standing with two feet on the earth, enjoying their bodies and touching them, enjoying playing with them. One particulair moment of support was when I was in another house than I lived in, sharing some grieve I was not clear on with Esteni and experiencing sadness in this. One big dog was really pushing his body towards me until he was sitting in front of me, and offered his body to pull my arms around, to hold him tightly and cry, which gave really stability and support within this experience of sadness, to let out the tears. Just to be with him and hold him for a while without needing to explain what is going on and holding his body as a stability point.

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Back in The Netherlands; does this mean my process is easy now? Again, No. After going to the farm, it is for sure easier than the year before. I am more stable, less emotional, and not feeling ‘lost’ anymore, which means I am able to support myself. I have seen all these living examples, I have lived with them and spoken to them, which makes walking process tangible for me.

I still experience difficulties almost every day as I have been programmed for 39 years before I started this process as deprogramming myself from all these structures, and this ‘heavy experience or difficulties’ is part of my programming, it is the structure of my mind – I have never jumped lightly through life. Resistance is a daily experience. Which means, I am pushing on the right buttons, the points that need self-investigation.

Does this mean that walking process is only possible after going to the farm? Also, No. I would have walked on anyway, also if I was not able to visit the people in South-Africa. The support that is available is becoming more effective, as for example the Dip-Lite course, and other participants are becoming more effective; the amount of information available is growing, and within this there is a lot of support available on the internet. In the end, it is about priciples and instructions that are implying what is best for all, that we have to use as a starting-point and thet we have to integrate in and as the physical by ourselves.

It is about becoming our own point of support, working together in a group of people who live in and as the same principles as what is best for all, supporting each other where and when necessary.

So, is it possible for everyone to enter the farm for a visit in any moment?

No. This is simply and practically not possible and there is also a dedication asked for at least 1 year walking the Dip-pro course and writing a journey to life blog. All the information is available on the internet. You have all access, and it is up to each one self, to investigate the principles that are presented, to test them for self, in self, by applying in your own life, and to prove to yourself what is real and what is not. In several countries there are people who are walking this proces for quite some time, and they are available on the internet, via blogs, via the forum, via a free course with a personal buddy, and maybe even in your physical environment. And everyone can step in, just as I and others did; everyone who is really interested in self-investigation in self-honesty and willing to follow priciples and instructions to support yourself, while working together in a group in finding solutions for worldchange, to make the world a place where all living beings have a dignified life. Which is a long way to go.